Unless you have been living under a rock and that rock is in another universe, then you have heard of Game of Thrones. We are in the homestretch of G.O.T., the final season and every fan is both thrilled and terrified for every upcoming episode. Who’s gonne make it? Who will sit on the throne? At this rate will there even be a throne? The tension is palpable. And in order to release that tension we found several similarities between some our favorite G.O.T. characters and some particularly hot items that will have you screaming about that thing that winter does. I mean hasn’t everyone wondered what their favorite Game Of Thrones characters would be if they were sex toys?
Now because G.O.T. has more characters than Little Finger has secrets, I obviously cannot mention them all. So, in this article I will hit some high notes and some fan favorites as well.
1. Khal Drogo
Khal Drogo is strong, sexy, powerful and big… in stature. He is a character that was short lived in the show but left a lasting impression in our hearts and our fantasies. For that reason I have chosen Satisfyer Master.
Like Drogo, the Satisfyer Master means business with its impressive size and powerful motor. The Master has 12 sheet-gripping speeds and 6 toe-curling patterns that is sure to leave a lasting impression.
2. Tyrion Lannister
Tyrion Lannister is witty, well-read, intelligent and often underestimated. He has been The Hand to not one but two queens and maybe one of the most influential characters in the G.O.T. universe. There has always been so much anticipation surrounding this character. He is always there to get his queen to her end goal and never gives up, I guess you could say he’s got Moxie.
SNEAK PEEK: The Moxie is an upcoming new smart and powerful panty vibe from We-Vibe. Your lover can use the app on their phone to build your anticipation from anywhere in the world. From the halls in Westeros to the shores of Meereen, you can be tantalized and teased right up until the end. This device really knows things. Use any one of the 10 preset patterns or customize your own for a truly unique experience. This will be hitting the store shelves very soon.
3. Khalesi aka Daenerys Targaryen, Queen Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen, the first of her name, Queen of the Andals, the Rhynar and the First Men, Lady of the Seven Kingdoms and Protector of the Realm, Lady of Dragonstone, Queen of Meereen, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, the Unburnt, Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons.
Daenerys Targaryen has had a lot going on since the second she stepped on to the scene in season 1. She is beautiful and polite in appearance but beneath her unassuming soft demeanor she is strong, confident and determined. She is not at all patient and is always making strategic moves towards her goal. And because of this I have chosen The Womanizer.
The Womanizer aka The Best in it’s Name, God’s Gift To Women, The Bringer of Orgasms, The Miracle Worker, The Pleasure Provider, The Untouchable, Queen of clitoral stimulation. Like Danny, The Womanizer is beautiful, sleek and unassuming. However, once put to the test the Womanizer brings orgasms in under 5 minutes. Enable the new autopilot mode for some unpredictable shuffle in settings and speeds that are sure to have you breaking some chains. Read more about the obsession here and here.
4. Jon Snow
Due to Jon Snow’s upbringing as a bastard he has a developed a hard outer demeanor. He is loyal, sexy, serious and just. He fits in well with most groups and becomes respected once they see his honest and earnest nature. He may seemingly know nothing but as we have seen he really knows how to please his wildling and his queen.
The Njoy Pure Wand is a stainless steel non-vibrating toy that appears hardcore and serious. While it appears to know nothing, this toy is the ultimate in g-spot pleasure. It is perfectly weighted and curved to hit the g-spot and provide the pressure needed for dragon raising g-spot orgasms. For all new experiences dip the Pure Wand in warm water or play with it in the snow. Like Jon Snow, this fantasy isn’t just for women. The Pure Wand is an amazing prostate stimulation toy for that ultimate full body orgasm.
5. Jaime Lannister
Jaime Lannister is charming, intelligent and thorough. He has had many ups and downs through the 8 seasons. Surprising fans in every episode maneuvering the hills and valleys of his relationships with Cersei, Brianne, Tyrion and Tyrell. It is impressive the way he learns and adapts in to a better man in the later seasons.
The new and improved Tenga Flip now comes with dual vibration for his pleasure. Similarly to Jaime the Flip Zero has many thrilling hills and valleys. Two powerful motors and pressure plates to increase tightness ensures to get the job done, even if you have do it one handed.
6. Brienne of Tarth
Brienne of Tarth a.k.a The Big Woman, has become a fan favorite over the years due to her strength, loyalty and trustworthiness. She was originally intended for one purpose and has since developed into her own remaining loyal and goal oriented no matter what. She has bested most of the others when put to the test. She seems to always be there when you need her. For these reasons she reminds me of The Magic Wand.
The Hitachi Magic Wand is an oldie but a goody. Like Brienne it is not depicted as the most elegant of the bunch. However, this toy is powerful and trustworthy to always get you that ending that is so good you scream it’s name. It never fails to please and is always there when you need it.
7. Tormund Giantsbane
Tormund is fierce and a born warrior of the free folk. He is both dangerous and loyal in equal measure and can be intimidating to some people. His obsession with “The Big Woman”, warmed him a place in our hearts as, we shipped these two hard! Because of his intense warrior status and his equally lovable unrequited love of Brienne, I have chosen 2 items for this character.
First, the Thigh Sling from Sportsheets. That sexy red color is not the only thing these two have in common. Like Tormund, this can seem intimidating at first, however, you come to find that the sling assists you in several positions. Wrap the soft vegan leather straps around your thighs or put your feet in them like stirrups, to hold those legs up and open. Leaving yours and your partner’s hands free to run wildly across your body.
Secondly, Nipple Suckers. I don’t want to spoil anything but, if you watched Season 8 episode 2 you know why.
Now if you are sitting there like “But my favorite character is Cersei.” I’m gonna need you to go over there and have a seat in time-out, think about your morality and suck on some dragon glass. I know that I couldn’t get all the faves in here, but I hope you enjoyed my list of mostly spoiler free sexy Game Of Thrones fun. Did you agree with my list? Did we miss one of your favorites? If you would like to pick up a “cast member” from this list or an entire unsullied army of items, stop by any of our 5 locations today.