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For Him

Ask Beth: What are my options if I can’t take the “little blue pill”?

December 16, 2013 by Velvet Box

Paige

Hi, I’m Beth Boatman and I am a professional human sexuality educator and consultant dedicated to enlightening adults about all things related to sexuality.

My interest in sexuality started as a curious child who asked my parents LOTS of questions. Fortunately, my parents were excellent at providing me with both honest and age-appropriate information. While searching for my life goals in my early college years, I found my calling at Widener University, which houses the only fully accredited doctoral program in human sexuality in the country.

I am a lifelong resident of the Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas area and have provided individuals with sexuality education on topics ranging from sexual transmitted infection prevention to female ejaculation.

When I’m not teaching about sexuality I’m doing yoga, window-shopping at fancy grocery stores, spending time with people I love, and experimenting in the kitchen with new recipes.

Connect with me on Facebook, Twitter, or online.

Q: I’m getting older and sometimes have ED. What are my options if I can’t take the “little blue pill”?

Posted by Beth, The Sex Consultant on Oct 21, 2013

A: Thanks for your question. If you pay attention to the media (especially during football season and other male directed TV programs) you may think your only option for erectile dysfunction (ED) is the little blue pill. Actually, there are a quite few options you can choose from.

Having a “not as firm” erection is a normal part of the aging process, but erectile dysfunction is when you cannot maintain an erection at all. Below are the various options for ED. Bear in mind I am not a medical doctor. Please speak with your medical provider or a urologist to find out which option is right for you.

Pumps

There is a common misconception that penis pumps increase size, but they are really meant to help you maintain an erection.

  • Penis pumps are hard-plastic cinders that fit over the penis and create a vacuum using suction. They are used to help men get an erection or simulate oral sex. Pumps are not medical devices used for penis enlargement or a cure for erection difficulties. The pump creates a vacuum around the body party on which it is placed and draws blood into the area. The body part will swell slightly as a result of the increased blood flow to the area. This size change is temporary. It is recommended that you limit pumping to no longer than 20 minutes, twice a week.
  • The band (cock ring) prevents blood from returning to the body and acts as a tourniquet. You can only keep the band on for a max of 30 minutes. Otherwise, you run the risk of starving your penis of oxygen rich blood which will lead to tissue damage (VERY BAD).
  • Often, there is a “hinging” effect on the penis while using the band (penis swings back and forth at base due to the band).

Prescriptions 

  • PDE-5 inhibitors (Viagra, Cialis, Levitra)-A pill. PDE-5 inhibitors work by relaxing smooth muscle, allowing the penis to fill with blood. Sometimes insurance will cover some or most of the cost.
  • Intra-urethal alprostadil (Muse)*– You use an applicator to insert a small “seed” or pill into your urethra. It relaxes the smooth muscles and allows blood to fill the penis. I hear it “stings like crazy” and its about $30 a dose ($30 per erection).
  • Intra-cavernosal injection*– Using a small (insulin size) needle to inject medicine into the side of the penis. This is cheaper ($2-$3 a dose) and works for everybody.

*Muse and the injection may not seem very comfortable, but if you have a heart condition, are a survivor of prostate cancer, or have another medical condition prohibiting the use of PDE-5 inhibitors these may be an excellent option for you. 

Surgery

You can also get various types of penile implants surgically placed to give your penis an erection. Some are stiff rods (you always have an erection) and some “pump up” when needed. (You actually squeeze an airbag placed in your scrotum to inflate it.) Of course with surgery there is always a risk. Talk with your doctor to find out more.

Mental  and Physical Health

Sometimes ED is caused by psychological stuff (stress at work, depression, etc.) and can be helped by talking with a licensed mental health professional. Also, in order for a penis to get an erection you need to have healthy blood flow. Eating right and exercising (including kegel exercises) can help strengthen your erection.

Once again, talk with your doctor about all your options and what may be the best for you.

Filed Under: For Him, Sex Education

Ask Beth: Can a man with a small penis still pleasure a woman?

July 23, 2013 by Velvet Box

PaigeHi, I’m Beth Boatman and I am a professional human sexuality educator and consultant dedicated to enlightening adults about all things related to sexuality.

My interest in sexuality started as a curious child who asked my parents LOTS of questions. Fortunately, my parents were excellent at providing me with both honest and age-appropriate information. While searching for my life goals in my early college years, I found my calling at Widener University, which houses the only fully accredited doctoral program in human sexuality in the country.

I am a lifelong resident of the Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas area and have provided individuals with sexuality education on topics ranging from sexual transmitted infection prevention to female ejaculation.

When I’m not teaching about sexuality I’m doing yoga, window-shopping at fancy grocery stores, spending time with people I love, and experimenting in the kitchen with new recipes.

Connect with me on Facebook, Twitter, or online.

Q: Can a man with a small penis still pleasure a woman?

A: Sexual pleasure does not solely rely on filling the vagina with a big penis. If you still have doubts, consider two lesbians having mind blowing sex with each other!  And many of them do it without a big dildo involved. If this weren’t true you would have tons of lesbians cheating with big penised men or going out and buying up all the big dildos in sex toy stores, but this just isn’t the case…

Even when women (straight or other) choose to buy dildos for personal use, they generally choose one on the smaller side. Most of the giant dildos stay on the shelf a bit longer.

There is a vast network of nerves in your body that when stimulated provided sexual satisfaction. In the genital region the nerves branch out to to the clitoris, labia, vagina, anus and buttocks. There are even branches to the neck, lips, and breast and nipples. Basically, the vagina isn’t the only place that provides orgasmic pleasure for women. In fact, most women need clitoral stimulation (which is external), and NOT vaginal penetration, in order to orgasm.

This is a very common concern for men. Many men are worried their penises are too small. Honestly, great sex is about CONFIDENCE, good communication (involving the entire body) and making your partner feel like you have never wanted anyone more in your life.

If you still doubt what I’m saying, you can always buy some sexual aids. There are many books, toys, and even penis extenders that you can wear over your penis during intercourse to make it seem bigger. The WeVibe is a great little toy that fits inside the vagina and also provides much-needed vibrations to the clitoris during intercourse.  Men get a nice sensation on the penis as well!  Having this little toy in place while you are having sex with your partner is going to make it seem like your penis has more girth to it because the vagina will have two things (your penis and the toy) inside during intercourse. Just make sure you use plenty of lube with this toy.

Filed Under: For Him, Sex Education

Ask Beth: Can I Make My Penis Larger?

June 14, 2013 by Velvet Box

PaigeHi, I’m Beth Boatman and I am a professional human sexuality educator and consultant dedicated to enlightening adults about all things related to sexuality.

My interest in sexuality started as a curious child who asked my parents LOTS of questions. Fortunately, my parents were excellent at providing me with both honest and age-appropriate information. While searching for my life goals in my early college years, I found my calling at Widener University, which houses the only fully accredited doctoral program in human sexuality in the country.

I am a lifelong resident of the Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas area and have provided individuals with sexuality education on topics ranging from sexual transmitted infection prevention to female ejaculation.

When I’m not teaching about sexuality I’m doing yoga, window-shopping at fancy grocery stores, spending time with people I love, and experimenting in the kitchen with new recipes.

Connect with me @
Facebook.com/thesexconsultant
Twitter @SexConsultants
www.BethTheSexConsultant.com

Q: I want to make my penis larger. Is there a pill that works or a pump that works that won’t cost a lot?

Oh, penis enlargement! One of the most common questions asked by men but it’s next to impossible to get a straight answer. We are constantly bombarded by advertisements and gimmicks that promise “giant dicks” (especially on porn websites). Even I had to do some research and make sure my facts were straight on this one. Here is the truth on penis enlargement…

Ways to give your boy a boost:

Pills

The term “herbal” or “dietary supplement” means it’s not regulated by the FDA. This basically means there is no medical or clinical evidence to prove it has any effect on anything. All in all, you are wasting your money.

Be warned! These pills can interact with other medications so please advise your doctor/pharmacist if you are taking something to attempt to make your dick bigger. No matter how embarrassing it may be.

When it comes to prescriptions (Viagra, Cialis, etc) they are meant to give you an erection and will not make your cock larger.

Penis Pumps

The ones that work the best are the most expensive, but once again it does not make your schlong permanently larger. It only gives you an erection.

  • Pumps pull blood into your penis by vacuum pump. Then, when your penis is filled with blood you “tie” it off at the base with the provided band (basically a cock ring).
  • The ring prevents blood from returning to the body. You can only keep the ring on for a max of 30 minutes. Otherwise, you run the risk of starving your penis of oxygen-rich blood which will lead to tissue damage.
  • Often, there is a “hinging” effect on the penis while using the ring (the penis swings back and forth at the base).
  • This device is really just for men who have difficulties getting and maintaining an erection.

Male Traction Devices

A device you strap to your penis for an extended period of time to make it longer. Over time the device slowly stretches out the spongy material in the penis to give it length. There are a few different brands, but I believe SizeGenetics (~$400) is the only one backed up by a clinical study. Be prepared that this takes a lot of time and patience (months to a year) and sometimes you don’t get the results you want.

Surgery

There is also penile enlargement surgery. A surgeon will cut the ligament that holds the penis in its usual position and weights will be used to stretch it out. The procedure may result in scar tissue, the erection may point down, and the base of the penis will be hairy. Girth can be increased by injecting fat from other parts of the body into the penis. Sometimes this results in a bumpy and odd-looking texture. Many urologists won’t perform this type of surgery unless there are good therapeutic reasons.

Conclusion

There is no magic pill to make you have a bigger Johnson. Male traction devices and surgery are probably the only clinically proven (but expensive) ways to make your penis larger. Your cheapest and safest option would be to purchase a penis extender that fits over your penis during sex to make it seem larger. Seriously though, do you really need to make your penis bigger??

Filed Under: For Him, Sex Education

Mixes Plaid, Charity, & Sex

October 30, 2012 by Velvet Box

At Sir Richard’s Condom Company, we believe the power of business can help bring health and pleasure to the global community.

The Sir Richard’s story began back in 2009 when a group of entrepreneurs and designers came together to create a different kind of company.

The Problem: A huge condom shortage is leaving millions of people susceptible to some of the world’s most preventable diseases.

The Challenge: From the ground up, build a company with the power to help address this pressing global health crisis.

Our Mission: For every Sir Richard’s Condom purchased, we donate one to a developing country.

But we don’t just stop there. Wherever we make a donation, we design an entirely new brand and ensure its cultural relevance with help and guidance from local artists, healthcare providers, and others. And, of course, we make certain that all of our condoms are of the highest quality by using only carefully sourced ingredients and avoiding those that nobody would want in their bedroom.

Today, Sir Richard’s is sold coast-to-coast in the U.S. You can find our condoms at our online shop or, should the immediate need arise, at your local or independent grocer.

Filed Under: For Him

Aneros – The Original Male G-Spot Stimulator!

July 20, 2012 by Velvet Box Leave a Comment

ANEROS MGX

The MGX is a medically researched and designed device that works in harmony with your body’s own movements. It stimulates both the prostate and the perineum in a rhythmic motion that builds up to unprecedented male orgasms. The MGX is easy to use and fulfilling for both the beginner and the expert, with progressively rewarding exercises and experiences.

The MGX is well balanced with a ribbed stem for anal canal stimulation and stability. The perineum tab provides an external prostate massage through the perineum.

• Ribbed stem
• Standard perineum tab
• Polished to hold lubricant for better movement
• For beginning and experienced users
• One of Playgirl Magazine sex columnist’s two favorite toys for men.
• Sue Johanson’s Top 10 Toys

Aneros converts the body’s own anal-sphincter muscle contractions into fuel for itself. Each “squeeze” of the anal-sphincter causes the Aneros to pivot forward, providing a direct internal massage of the prostate. When the man “relaxes” the sphincter muscle, the Aneros pivots back, pressing on the pernieum for an external prostate massage. The man’s body becomes in tune with this cycle of squeezing and relaxing, and he begins to experience involuntary contractions of the sphincter muscle.

This virtually simultaneous stimulation of the prostate and perineum enables a man to experience a wide variety of mind-blowing sensations.

Our Patented, Innovative Design Is Made For Pleasure
The medically researched and designed Aneros was developed specifically to massage what is becoming commonly referred to as the Male G-Spot – the prostate, or more specifically, the prostate-perineum. As the only medically researched and patented prostate massager, the Aneros is by far the most effective of any available massager on the market, anatomically designed to work perfectly with the male body.

The Aneros is made of a high-quality, non-porous, medical-grade plastic. The unique shape is comprised of three primary parts:

1. The Head and Stem
The Head and Stem of the Aneros are expressly designed to nuzzle right up against the prostate. The subtle curves of the stem serve a second purpose as well, to provide stimulation up and down the anal canal which enhances the Aneros experience. The head applies the proper amount of pressure on the prostate for an effective prostate massage. The force of this pressure is controlled only by the man’s anal-sphincter contractions, never by his hands. Taking the hands out of the equation frees the mind to focus specifically on the sensations received from the Aneros.

2. The Perineum Tab (Abutment)
The interesting looking Perineum Tab (or P-Tab) serves an important purpose in the function of the Aneros. The P-Tab provides an external prostate massage by pressing against the perineum. Men and women have known about the perineum for quite some time. The reason why it feels good to have it pushed on during sex is because it’s really an external prostate massage!

The P-Tab provides pleasurable sensations by pressing against the perineum, but it does more than that by working in tandem with the Head and Stem to facilitate the pivoting action of the Aneros. With the Aneros, a man experiences both an internal and external prostate massage simultaneously. It’s the continuous stimulation of the prostate and perineum that leads to stronger orgasms and possibly the Super-O as well.

3. The Handle
The handle has the simple function of being used to insert and remove the Aneros. That’s it. The Aneros is completely hands-free, which means manual manipulation of the device is never needed. In fact, we recommend to never use your hands to move the device – it is counter-productive and possibly dangerous to do so.

Filed Under: For Him, Prostate

How Do Penis Pumps Work?

May 25, 2012 by Velvet Box

According to data collected by the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS), Medicare has spent more than $240 million of taxpayer money on penis pumps for elderly men over the past decade, and will surpass a quarter of a billion dollars this year for costs since 2001. (Heartlander)

Doctors view the penis pump—or “vacuum constriction device,” as it’s called in the business—as a reasonable, low-cost treatment for erectile dysfunction. A report from the American Urological Association says that constriction devices might be useful in cases where PDE5-inhibitor drugs like Viagra are ineffective. Still, most men (or couples) don’t like using the penis pump: The report concludes that “low patient acceptability limits the application or use of this therapy.”

The device consists of an acrylic tube and a pumping mechanism, which can be a squeeze ball, a hand grip, a plunger, or an electric device. As the user pumps air out of the tube, the resulting vacuum increases blood flow into his erectile tissue. He then slides a “constriction ring” or cock ring over the base of his penis to maintain the erection when he removes the tube.

A vacuum erection may not always feel like the real thing. Various sources describe them as “spongy and semi-flaccid,” purplish in color, and sometimes cold or numb. But clinical studies still find high rates of satisfaction among those who receive the vacuum treatment for ED. (Researchers measure the effectiveness of a treatment by asking patients to rate their sexual experiences on the “International Index of Erectile Function.”)

The vacuum pumps have also proved successful in studies of penile rehabilitation. Certain procedures—like radical prostatectomies—can cause temporary impotence as a result of nerve damage. If you go long enough without a spontaneous erection, some of your penile tissue can atrophy, causing long-term dysfunction. It turns out that postoperative use of a penis pump may help stave off this damage.

Penis pumps are available over the counter, and some men without ED use them for masturbation or to increase their length or girth. To accomplish this latter goal, vendors suggest 30-minute sessions three or four times per week for a period of several months. The medical literature, however, does not support the idea that vacuum constriction will produce a lasting change in penis size.

If anything, overuse of the pump can damage the penis. The American Urological Association recommends only those devices that come with a “vacuum limiter,” which automatically lets in air if too much negative pressure builds in the tube. Excessive pumping without the vacuum limiter can cause penile bruising, or—in extreme cases—very serious tissue damage.  (Daniel Engber, Slate.com)

Filed Under: For Him, Sex Education

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