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Communication Tools

What Our Product Experts Wish Every Customer Knew

July 14, 2026 by Velvet Box

There is a moment we see almost every day.

Someone opens the door, takes two steps inside, and immediately slows down.

Their eyes scan the room. Not the products. The people.

They’re checking to see who is here.

They aren’t looking for someone they know. They’re hoping they don’t find them.

A few minutes later, after they’ve realized nobody is paying attention to them, their shoulders relax. They start browsing. They pick something up. They ask a question.

By the time they leave, they’re usually wondering why they were nervous in the first place.

We’ve watched some version of this happen thousands of times.

People often assume that working at Velvet Box means spending most of our time talking about products. The products are certainly part of the conversation, but they rarely feel like the most interesting part. What stays with us are the people—the hesitations, the stories, and the quiet moments when someone stops feeling like they’re the only person who has ever asked a particular question.

After years of these conversations, there are a few things we’ve found ourselves wishing every customer knew before they ever walked through our doors.

One of the most common concerns we hear isn’t about products at all.

Nobody Is Judging You

It’s the fear of being seen.

Sometimes a customer says it directly. Sometimes it arrives disguised as a joke. Sometimes it’s whispered at the register after a purchase has already been made.

“What if someone sees me here?”

The concern makes sense. For all the progress we’ve made in talking openly about relationships, confidence, wellness, and self-discovery, intimacy still occupies a strange place in our culture. People will discuss stress, finances, parenting, and even therapy over dinner, yet conversations about intimacy often remain tucked away behind closed doors.

One afternoon a customer admitted she was worried about running into someone she knew. We laughed and told her, “That would actually be great. They’re here doing the exact same thing you are.”

Most people are too busy worrying about themselves to spend much time thinking about anyone else. They’re focused on their own questions, their own relationships, their own curiosity, and whatever brought them through the door that day.

A customer can spend three days worrying about walking through the door, and three minutes after arriving they’re having a conversation they never expected to have. Not because the fear wasn’t real. Because most fears look much larger from the parking lot.

There Is No Such Thing as a Typical Customer

People often imagine there is a certain type of person who shops at Velvet Box.

We’re still trying to figure out who that person is.

We’ve watched a grandmother and granddaughter shop on the same afternoon. We’ve helped a couple celebrating forty years together and someone preparing for a first date. We’ve seen women walk in carrying confidence and women walk in carrying a list they wrote in their Notes app because they couldn’t quite bring themselves to say the words out loud.

None of them looked like each other.

All of them had questions.

People arrive believing their questions are unusual, their concerns are unique, or their uncertainty somehow sets them apart.

Then they discover they’re standing in a long line of human beings who have wondered many of the same things.

Curiosity, connection, confidence, excitement, uncertainty, vulnerability—these tend to show up repeatedly, regardless of age, relationship status, or life stage.

The Most Expensive Product Is Rarely the Best Product

Every industry has its version of the belief that more expensive automatically means better.

Sometimes that’s true. Often it isn’t.

We’ve watched customers arrive convinced they need the newest, most advanced, feature-packed option available. Twenty minutes later they’re leaving with something simpler, less expensive, and far better suited to what they were looking for.

The difference usually comes down to fit. The products people love most aren’t necessarily the products with the longest list of features. They’re the products that feel approachable, comfortable and intuitive. The ones that fit naturally into someone’s life rather than demanding they become someone else to use them.

There is often a visible sense of relief when customers realize they don’t need the biggest, newest, or most expensive option on the shelf.

The products people return to are rarely the ones that looked most impressive on the shelf. They’re usually the ones that fit comfortably into someone’s life.

Most People Think They’re Shopping for a Product

Sometimes someone walks in asking for a specific item they saw online.

Twenty minutes later they’re leaving with something completely different.

Not because they were sold something.

Because the conversation revealed they were solving a different problem than they originally thought.

Someone arrives looking for a recommendation because a friend suggested it. Someone else wants the item they saw trending on social media. Another person has spent weeks reading reviews and arrives convinced they’ve already done all the research.

Sometimes it only takes a few minutes before the conversation starts moving in a different direction.

The internet has made information incredibly accessible. What it cannot do is sit across from someone and understand context.

Two people can purchase the exact same product and have entirely different experiences with it. Human beings have always been more complicated than algorithms.

By then, the conversation is usually about something different than where it started.

Questions Usually Lead Somewhere Better

Sometimes a conversation changes the moment a customer stops worrying about how the question sounds and simply asks it.

A question about materials becomes a conversation about comfort. A question about maintenance becomes a conversation about confidence. A question about a gift turns into a discussion about communication and connection.

Those conversations rarely end where they begin.

Connection Matters More Than Products

This may sound like a strange thing for people in our industry to admit, but products are rarely the most memorable part of the interaction.

When you’ve spent enough years talking with customers, you start noticing that the conversations tend to linger longer than the purchases.

A woman once spent twenty minutes asking questions about a product before finally admitting that what she was really worried about was how to bring up the subject with her husband. Another customer walked in convinced she needed a recommendation and left having spent most of her visit talking about a challenge she’d never discussed with anyone before. We’ve watched couples disagree in one aisle and leave laughing together twenty minutes later. We’ve also watched people arrive looking for answers and discover that the thing they needed most was simply hearing that their experience wasn’t unusual.

One of the privileges of this work is getting a front-row seat to the reality that most people are carrying far more than they initially reveal. The item they’re asking about is often attached to something larger that doesn’t appear in the first question. Sometimes they know that when they walk in. Sometimes they discover it while they’re here.

Over time, you begin to appreciate how often people are searching for something that can’t be packaged, displayed, or placed on a shelf.

We Want You to Feel Comfortable

Every now and then, someone apologizes before asking a question.

Usually, the question is perfectly ordinary.

After years of these conversations, that’s probably the thing we wish every customer knew before walking through our doors.

You don’t need to arrive as an expert.

You only need to arrive.

Filed Under: Communication Tools, For Her, For Him, For Us, Sex Education

Amazon Can’t Teach You This: Why In-Person Guidance Still Matters

June 1, 2026 by Maria Jose Abud Del Rio

Most people don’t walk into an intimacy store feeling confident.

They walk in nervous.
Overwhelmed.
Curious.
Embarrassed.
Hopeful.

Sometimes all at once.

We’ve had couples sit in the parking lot for twenty minutes before coming inside together for the first time. We’ve had women whisper questions because they were afraid someone nearby might hear them. We’ve had customers apologize before asking completely normal questions about their own bodies, relationships, or pleasure.

And honestly? That says a lot more about our culture than it does about them.

Because intimacy is one of the few areas of life where people are expected to magically know what they like, how to communicate it, and how to feel confident asking for it — without ever being taught.

So people do what they’ve always done:
they turn to the internet.

And while online shopping may be convenient, there are some things algorithms simply cannot provide:
reassurance, emotional safety, personalized guidance, and the feeling that you are completely normal for asking the question in the first place.

At Velvet Box, we believe intimacy deserves more than anonymous reviews and endless scrolling. We believe people deserve a safe place to explore, ask questions, and learn without judgment.

Because intimacy is personal.

And guidance should be personal too.

The Story Most People Are Telling Themselves

Before many first-time customers walk through our doors, there’s already a story playing in their head.

“The employees are probably going to judge me.”

“I’m too inexperienced to ask this.”

“I should probably already know this by now.”

“I’m going to feel uncomfortable.”

“The store is probably going to feel intimidating.”

The truth?

Most people who walk into Velvet Box are not looking for shock value or some wild, over-the-top experience.

They’re looking for connection.
Confidence.
Comfort.
Answers.
Permission to feel okay exploring a part of themselves they’ve never felt comfortable talking about before.

That’s why creating emotional safety matters so much to us.

Velvet Box was created because too many people felt uncomfortable, judged, or overwhelmed in spaces that were supposed to support intimacy and exploration. We believed there had to be a better experience — one rooted in education, warmth, professionalism, and respect.

So we built one.

The Internet Gives You Products. Not Confidence.

There’s no shortage of options online.

Search for a vibrator, lubricant, lingerie set, or couples toy and you’ll instantly find thousands of products, conflicting reviews, social media trends, and advice from strangers who know absolutely nothing about your body, your comfort level, your relationship, or your experience.

And that’s where many people get stuck.

Because what they’re really asking is not:
“What’s the most popular product?”

What they’re really asking is:
“What’s right for me?”

That answer is harder to find online.

Algorithms can recommend what’s trending. They cannot tell you:

  • what’s beginner-friendly
  • what’s body-safe
  • what works well for couples
  • what may feel overwhelming
  • what materials matter
  • what products actually fit your comfort level
  • or how to navigate the emotional side of trying something new

And that emotional side matters more than most people realize.

We regularly meet customers who bought something online that looked great in reviews but left them feeling intimidated, disappointed, uncomfortable, or convinced intimacy products just “weren’t for them.”

In reality, they simply didn’t have guidance.

Sometimes People Don’t Need A Product First. They Need Permission.

One of the most powerful moments we witness is when someone realizes they don’t have to feel embarrassed anymore.

You can actually see the relief happen in real time.

A customer asks a nervous question.
One of our team members responds calmly and kindly.
Nobody laughs.
Nobody makes them feel awkward.
Nobody pressures them.

And suddenly their shoulders relax.

That moment matters.

Because often the most valuable thing we provide is not a product at all.

It’s permission.

Permission to ask questions.
Permission to explore slowly.
Permission to prioritize pleasure, confidence, connection, or curiosity without shame attached to it.

That’s something online shopping cannot replicate.

What An In-Store Experience Should Actually Feel Like

There’s a stereotype people often have about adult stores, especially if they’ve never been inside an upscale intimacy boutique before.

Many expect something dark, aggressive, uncomfortable, or transactional.

What they usually experience at Velvet Box is the opposite.

Warm lighting.
Calm conversations.
Professional guidance.
No pressure.
No embarrassment.
No expectation that you should already know everything.

Our team is trained to educate first, not sell first. That means conversations are centered around comfort, communication, experience level, and what someone is actually hoping to feel — not simply what product is most expensive or trendy.

Sometimes that means recommending something simpler than the customer expected.
Sometimes it means reassuring a couple that awkward conversations are normal.
Sometimes it means explaining body-safe materials, compatibility, or how to ease into something new gradually.

And sometimes it simply means listening.

Because intimacy is deeply personal.
There is no universal “right way” to explore it.

Why Human Guidance Matters More Than Ever

We live in a world where almost everything has become automated, optimized, and filtered through algorithms.

But human connection still matters.
Especially in vulnerable spaces.

People don’t want to feel like a transaction when they’re asking personal questions about their body, relationship, confidence, or sexuality.

They want to feel understood.

That’s why in-person guidance matters.

Not because people can’t shop online.
But because intimacy is more nuanced than clicking “Add to Cart.”

The right conversation can:

  • reduce shame
  • build confidence
  • improve communication between partners
  • prevent uncomfortable experiences
  • help people feel safer in their own exploration

That’s not just retail.
That’s care.

And in many ways, that’s what makes Velvet Box different from traditional adult stores, online marketplaces, or trend-driven intimacy brands.

We are not here to overwhelm people.

We are here to help people feel comfortable enough to explore what connection, confidence, and intimacy can actually look like for them.

You Deserve More Than Anonymous Reviews

There is absolutely nothing wrong with shopping online.

For some people, it’s the perfect fit.

But if you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, intimidated, uncertain, inexperienced, disconnected, or nervous about intimacy products, you are not alone.

And you are not bad at this.

You deserve more than anonymous reviews from strangers online.

You deserve to ask questions without feeling judged.
You deserve guidance that feels human.
You deserve education without embarrassment.
You deserve an experience that feels safe, warm, and respectful.

Most of all, you deserve to feel understood.

Because at the end of the day, people rarely remember the exact product they bought first.

They remember how they felt during the experience.

Seen.
Comfortable.
Respected.
Confident.

And that’s something no algorithm will ever be able to deliver.

Filed Under: Communication Tools, For Us, Sex Education Tagged With: education

Is your to-do list killing your sex life?

September 21, 2022 by Velvet Box

Picture this: you’re in bed with your significant other, things are getting hot and heavy, and the moment you are about to have sex, your long to-do list flashes through your mind, or you spy the dirty laundry on the floor you meant to do last week. Next thing you know, sex isn’t even on your mind anymore. Sound familiar? Your to-do list might be killing your sex life!

Several life factors can contribute to low libido, and responsibility is at the very top of the list. Having work, family, and household chores top of mind is not the golden ticket to getting in the mood for sex. Here, our resident sexologist Dr. Celeste Holbrook shares science-backed insight on why resolving your responsibilities outside of the bedroom can lead to increased libido, as well as a list of action items you can do to help you get there. 

Is your to-do list killing your sex life?

Did you know responsibility is the greatest killer of arousal? That means, when you are thinking about your work contracts, the laundry, or that call to your mother, your brain will find it difficult to focus on getting in the mood for sex. If you think about it, pleasure is the opposite of responsibility. Pleasure is a healthy sense of irresponsibility. Pleasure doesn’t outright have a purpose other than pleasure…and that can feel frivolous. But that helps us see how removing responsibilities from your thoughts is one of the ways you can step into your pleasure. It’s easier said than done, so here is a list of ways to prevent your to-do list from killing your sex life.

Ways to Prioritize Your Sex Life

1. Create a sexy, serene bedroom by removing the computer, bins of laundry, and pics of your kids from your nightstand.

2. Make sure your toys are charged and cleaned after every use, so you know they are good to go and you aren’t worried about them dying mid-orgasm.

3. Communicate with your partner earlier in the day about what is on your mind. Talk about what is making you anxious, frustrated or excited about the upcoming days or weeks and then resolve to leave those thoughts outside of your bedroom door during sex.

4. If you have kids, take some time to separate from the responsibility of caregiving by going for a walk, taking a bath or letting your partner put them to bed while you go to dinner on your own. 

5. Practice pleasure in other ways. Have an impromptu dance party in the mirror. Indulge in your favorite scent. Put your feet in the grass and look up at the clouds for a full 5 minutes.  Practicing pleasure in more accessible ways can help you step into pleasure in your bedroom.

  • Dr. Celeste Holbrook

At Velvet Box, it is our passion to help individuals just like you to achieve the intimacy and connection you deserve. While you work your way through this list, treat yourself to one of our webinars, communication tools, and or vibes to help you along the way. 

Go from To-Do to To-Daaaaang

  1. Need assistance creating a sexy bedroom? Our recent webinar, Build a Sexy Bedroom is available for on-demand purchase.
  2. Sex toys can bring more than just good vibes. Add a bit of vibration or air pulse technology, and you can experience more orgasms, even during penetrative sex. Treat yourself to a new vibe from our Expert Picks selection!
  3. Communication is lubrication. If you need extra guidance when talking to your partner, check out one of our many Communication Tools to get you started. 
  4. While your partner is taking care of the kids, get in the mood during your time alone with some lingerie. When you feel sexy, sex feels sexy.

View our full class catalog here and our online store here.

About Dr. Celeste Holbrook

Many of you may know our resident sexologist, Dr. Celeste Holbrook. Whether it’s through one or many of our intimacy classes with her, or perhaps you’ve been following her incredible Instagram all along (if not, we highly recommend you give her a follow). But for those who may not know her yet, Dr. Holbrook is a sexologist, speaker, and author who has dedicated her life to helping women achieve soul-centered sex through perfectly planned mental and behavioral changes. Learn more about Celeste and her journey as a sexologist on her website at drcelesteholbrook.com.

Filed Under: Communication Tools, Misc, Sex Education, Vibrators

New sex ed and intimacy classes coming soon!

March 23, 2022 by Velvet Box

At Velvet Box, we pride ourselves on providing incredible sexual education resources for individuals from every generation to grow in intimate connection and learn about their sexuality and needs in a safe, fun, and educational way. That’s why we’re back with new live classes for you, your partner, and others to learn about informative topics from the comfort of your own home.

Our most recent live class, Everything P0rn Didn’t Teach You was a hit, and we’re excited to share that we have more coming your way! Mark your calendars for our informative lineup of classes debuting on the second Tuesday of each month.

Note: Each participant’s name and identity are anonymous when joining the class.

April 12th – Your First Time – Click Here to Register

Nervous about having sex for the first time? You aren’t alone!  Most of us aren’t given a type of sexual education that helps us navigate pleasure and communication in our first sexual experience. Join this webinar to discover what to expect and how to be an advocate for your own pleasure from day one.

In this class, participants will:

1. Explore how to create a sexual ethic that can help you make sexual choices perfectly suited to you.

2. Discover what to expect your first time having sex.

3. Learn about and practice consent. 

May 10th – Raising Sexually Healthy Kids

Many of us want to give our kids more helpful sex education than we received from our parents…but where do you start?  Join our webinar to discover the small but meaningful steps you can take to ensure your kids are gaining the information they need to make healthy sexual choices for themselves. 

In this class, participants will:

1. Explore how your own sexual shame and experiences impact our education to our children. 

2. Discover authentic sexual communication that builds sexually resilient kids.

3. Identify how to discuss sex throughout different childhood ages. 

June 14th – Post-Partum – stay tuned for more information!

July 12th – 5 Sexual Myths – stay tuned for more information!

For the past 12 years, we’ve enjoyed being a part of your journey to intimate connection and sexual growth more than you know, and we look forward to having you with us on this next chapter of education! 

Can’t want to wait for our new courses to become available? Check out our on-demand course catalog with something for everyone.

Everyone deserves great sex, and you deserve to know what works for you. Get brave and come see us at one of our five Dallas-Fort Worth locations. We’re proud to help you.

Filed Under: Communication Tools, For Her, For Him, For Us, Sex Education

3 ways to have the best sex of your life this year

January 17, 2022 by Velvet Box

It’s 2022, and if we learned anything from the prior year it’s that the dialogue around sex and sexuality has grown into one that is open, popular, and – quite frankly – the new norm. We pride ourselves on being part of a modern evolution in which there are incredible resources for individuals from every generation to grow in intimate connection and learn about their own sexuality and needs in a safe and educational way. 

If prioritizing your sex life is a part of your New Year’s Resolutions, consider this your golden ticket to experiencing sensual and intimate pleasure in your body, soul, and partnerships. From communication tools to educational classes to utilizing industry experts as a source of advice and guidance on your road to sexual exploration, here are 3 ways you can have the best sex of your life this year. 

1. Talk about sex more

Communication both in and out of the bedroom is the most important aspect when trying to build intimacy in a partnership. Start discussing the things you like and want, and the things you don’t. However, we understand that it can be difficult to break down the barrier if sex isn’t normally a topic of discussion. If you need help on where to start, explore our communication tools for inspiration!

2. Explore what sparks your curiosity

Anal? Role play? Bondage? If there’s something outside your normal sex routine that you’re wanting to explore, there is no time like the present. You deserve sexual fulfillment, and it all begins with learning about it in a safe and educational way! If you’re looking for the entryway into the discussion with your partner, skip the fathomless internet and suggest you watch one of our on-demand classes on whatever you’re wanting to explore. From Booty Basics to Get Kinky to our all encompassing Spice Things Up bundle, our classes are the perfect, anonymous setting to start diving into new experiences – together.

3. Commit to some novelty in the bedroom

A great way to start having consistently great sex is by building a routine. Scheduling sex is a good idea, and commiting to trying something new each month or so is a great one. Try a new toy or product each month and commit to integrating it into your sex life and experience the new thrills you’re yearning for! For expert knowledge on everything from lube to vibrators, come into one of our 5 DFW locations and talk to one of our amazing trained sex-perts. There’s no need to be shy, we promise.

Commit to yourself and your pleasure this year. You don’t need a reason to, but if you’re looking for one, it’s because you deserve it. 

Everyone deserves great sex, and you deserve to know what works for you. Get brave and come see us at one of our five Dallas-Fort Worth locations. We’re proud to help you.

Filed Under: Communication Tools, For Us, Sex Education

Building Intimacy through Eye Gazing: An Exercise

November 2, 2021 by Velvet Box

It can often be difficult to feel truly connected during sex. Your mind can wander. Sometimes it feels like a task or chore that we are just checking off the list. You just don’t feel as present as you’d like to. Sound familiar?

According to Sex Therapist Dr. Celeste Holbrook, being present is the key to sensuality. Sensuality is by definition “enjoying your senses.” But you cannot enjoy your senses in the future or in the past. You have to be in the moment. 

Here, Dr. Holbrook has provided a quick exercise to sink into the moment prior to sex with your partner using your sense of vision. It is an eye gazing exercise that helps you direct your most highly relied upon sense (your eyesight) into the present. Note: This is a very intimate activity, so only start with 10 seconds.

Here is how you do it:

  1. Sit down comfortably, facing your partner.
  2. Set the timer. You may choose anywhere from 10 seconds to 10 minutes. Start with a time that feels comfortable but somewhat challenging and work up. The longer, the more powerful the experience.
  3. Gaze into the eyes of your partner. You can blink at any point, it’s not a staring competition.
  4. If you get distracted, simply bring back your awareness to the eyes of your partner.
  5. After the experience is over, grab a piece of paper and draw / write about how you are feeling.
  6. Talk about the experience with your partner…you may want to write down a few things in your journal immediately and talk about the experience later. That is okay. Just be sure to debrief at some point.

A note from Dr. Holbrook

Please know that this can be uncomfortable. If you think about it, we don’t sit and look at each other without the help of words to smooth the depth of the connection. But the important part is that you try. Try connecting in this way, on your bed, clothes on or off, before sex. After you get more comfortable with it, it will feel like a beautiful, intimate reset button. It is grounding, it is connective and it is happy!

You deserve to experience the intimacy you’re longing for, and Velvet Box is proud to provide you with resources to further your journey. For more information on building intimacy with your partner, view our Building Intimacy Checklist.

Everyone deserves great sex, and you deserve to know what works for you. Get brave and come see us at one of our five Dallas-Fort Worth locations. We’re proud to help you.

Filed Under: Communication Tools, For Her, For Him, For Us, Sex Education

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If you’re craving deeper connection (but struggle to talk about it), download The Intimacy Toolkit. These five communication games help you share your desires, understand each other, and reignite closeness.

Get excited about the possibilities.

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